We Just Lost Control: Keep Me Breathing
by angelo di desiderio
Summary: You can only keep sane for so long. You can only love yourself for so long. Once you lose control, everything else is lost. So the only way to stay sane is keep to


We Just Lost Control: Keep Me Breathing

A/N" ' ' are used for thoughts

You can only keep sane for so long. You can only love yourself for so long. Once you lose control, everything else is lost. So the only way to stay sane is keep to

control. But how can you when the world around you has already gone crazy?

"Tell me something..."

"...Yes?"

"Did you ever love me?"

"....Of course I loved you. I still do."

"Then..why?"

"Because I had to. I'm sorry....."

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"Alright I'm in." A husky voice said over a radio.

The response was static, "Alright now go to the main hall. There's going to be LOTS of people so try to act normal. The president should be standing center

front with a group huddled around him."

"Alright got it."

"Oh and Leonheart?" The man said

"...Yeah?" He replied sounding quite annoyed.

"Don't screw up!" And the transmission was cut off.

Squall just rolled his eyes and entered the room.

He spotted the president and a group of people along with a shy young girl standing next him. For a second he couldn't move. "I'll try", saying aloud but more to himself.

Then he realized he wasn't paying attention and quickly headed towards the president. He placed his hand into jacket pocket but didn't pull it out.

He pushed people out of the way and walked up to President Caraway slowly pulling his hand out of his pocket. He smiled as the man looked a little confused

by the young boy. "President Caraway...." He said softly and then fully pulled his arm out showing a gun. Everyone panicked and dropped to the floor except

for Caraway who stood stunned. The fear in his eyes was priceless.

The man looked over to his daughter who was also still standing looking at her father in pure fear. "Rinoa, I love you..." And that was his final words. As He

said those words his daughter ran up to him but it was too late and blood splattered across her face and dress. There were many screams and cries. She just

stood there staring at the lifeless body as blood trickled down to her shoes.

But Squall's job wasn't finished. He still held the gun in his hand shooting every other person in the room. Many of them scattered and screamed but

eventually they were all taken down. The room was a massacre. Finally there was only two left laying on the floor covered in blood. Caraway's daughter and a

older woman. The older woman pleaded for her life but Squall showed no mercy and shot her in the head. As she was silenced the young girl looked at him

with innocent eyes. A beautiful girl about Squall's age looked up at him. He was about to pull them trigger when he heard an incoming radio signal.

"LEONHEART."

He sighed and picked up the radio."Yeah. I got one left."

"Don't kill the her."

"Lucky for you I was just about too, what do we need her for?"

"Just bring her in."

"Alright."

He put away the radio and grabbed the young woman by the arm. She struggled but he pulled out his gun and she quickly calmed herself.

He took her outside where a car was parked. There were dead soldiers laying everywhere. 'He killed them all?'

He threw her inside and slammed the door shut as he entered as well.

He got a towel from the backseat and handed it to her. She quietly cleaned herself. Then she started to cry realizing she was cleaning off her father's blood.

Squall started the car and drive at 90 miles p/hour downtown. It took about 20 minutes and then they were there.

He got out of the car and locked the doors leaving her in there. Surprisingly, she didn't protest.

He entered the building and went to office #320. "Kinneas"

He looked up at Squall, "You got the girl"  
Squall nodded

"Good. Heard she's a real cutie." And Irvine winked.

"...Whatever..." Squall replied.

Irvine just smiled and replied, "Well turns out she's the only other one who knows where this place is. And we're pretty sure the only one who will show us

where it is. Well after some persuading of course..."

Squall just picked up the folder lying on the desk and scanned through it. "Quistis call?"

"Nope." Irvine scanned Squalls face before stating, "You SURE you two don't have anything going on?"

Squall looked up at him annoyed and answered, "....Whatever..." And walked off.

He walked out of the building and entered the car to find a crying girl. Of course he expected her too but it's just not something he's use to.

As he entered he said nothing to her. He didn't even spare her a pity glance.

She looked at him with red eyes. And i don't mean from crying. This was pure anger. "YOU KILLED MY FATHER!" And started to beat him with her fists as

hard as she could. Of course he easily blocked everyone but couldn't help to think how strong she was for a little thing. He just simply replied with,"..."

She suddenly looked even more hurt."How can you just say nothing! You murdered my father!"

Now Squall looked annoyed. 'She better know where this place is...'

"The Matron House!" She was startled by his sudden increase in volume.

"....Why do you want to go there?" She sounded calm but scared.  
'Please don't take me back...please...'

"I can't tell you that information yet."

"Oh great what are you some kind of special agent?"

'Sort of...' "Tell me where the house is." He asked again calmly.

"I'm not telling you! You murderer!"

A quick flex of the wrist and a clean smack across her face. She started crying. He was going to slap her again but she spoke.

"It's on have to get there by airship.." He just nodded and started the car.

'How can he be so cruel? His eyes are so deep, they're evil! Pure evil! This man is...he's insane.'

She looked at him. 'Doesn't he know what's there? Doesn't he know about iher/i'

"You're an insane, and horrible person!"

"Thank you."

Outraged she responded, "That was NOT a compliment!"

"Listen you're father wasn't who you thought he was...he deserved to die."

Shocked by this her eyes widened, "WHAT?"

"He built the Matron House and enslaved the famous Dr. Odine to work on a secret project. The details of that project were kept quiet until the release and

finish of the Matron House. Your mother, Julia, she was requested to play at the grand opening of the Matron House. That night your father raped Julia

Heartilly and thus you were created."

"I know...I know what he did to my mother. I never forgave him for that but I still love him! And you took him from me!"

"Let me finish please! Then you can decide if you want to still love him or not!"

She grew silent.

"SeeD was unaware of his plans until he made a public statement to the world. He and Dr. Odine had constructed a portal to open a gateway to the future.

His plan to the public was to bring world peace by bringing the Sorceress Ultmiecia to this world where she which she would govern to make a better place. He

promised the citizens of the world a safer future with this plan. Everyone had they're doubts, especially SeeD. We reacted immediately; since SeeD's role is to defeat the sorceress, by Taking action to try and stop his public ceremony of the arrival of the sorceress. This all happened when the both of us were perhaps

2 years old. Mere children being constructed into what they wanted us to be..."

"They? What are you talking about? After all of this are you trying to tell me you did me a FAVOR when you killed my father in front of me?! That you're

protecting me?!"

He nodded. "Yes Miss Heartilly."

Very confused she replied,"Protect me from what?"

He sighed. "Your father realized that if he warped the future sorceress here she would be destroyed from the time travel so he needed a body for her to be

born into. You were the chosen one by your father. Everyone protested but your father insisted you be the ruler and sorceress of this world. Your father was

going to make you into an evil powerful demon creature all at 2 years old."

She was stunned by all of this."He would never...do that.."

"Im afraid so. And Unfortunately Miss Heartilly, he was successful."

Frozen solid she blinked slowly."I'm...I'm a...?"

"Yes Miss Heartilly. They never completed the process but they're was just enough to grant you her powers, not her will. Caraway knew of this from the

beginning, he knew that raping Julia you would be created and your sole purpose was to become her...I'm sorry Miss."

"I was created...to be a monster?" Her eyes were welling up and she started to burst. He did not comfort her though. He did not know how.

"We need you to show us the house since you are the only one alive who knows of it's secret and now hidden location. We need to get there to close up the

portal before the future comes into the past and the prophecy of Sorceress Adel begins."

She did not say anything just continued to let tears roll down her cheek.

'When they trained me for SeeD I never expected I'd be doing something like this...'

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Squall arrived in Esthar City. They approached the Ragnorak. Esthar's elite air-transportation device. It's said to be able to reach the other side of the world

within 3 days.  
"We'll be flying there in this." Rinoa hadn't even bothered looking at the awe-inspiring ship.  
"We'll also be bringing along a few SeeDs with us to carry out the mission."

Then a petite girl stepped forward wearing a yellow sun dress."Heya I'm Selphie!" She said excitedly holding out a hand to Rinoa Heartilly. The girl did not

comply the handshake. "Cheer-up! We're going to save the world!"

Squall knew Selphie wasn't helping any but at least she tried.

"This is major Selphie Tilmitt. She will be flying the aircraft." Squall said.

"Boo-yaka!" She shouted as she pummeled a fist into the air. This gesture made Rinoa smile a little.

Another woman approached wearing red. Her hair was blonde and beautiful and her eyes were a perfect match to the blue sky. She was much taller than

Rinoa, and more covetous as well.

Standing in a casual position the woman spoke,"Miss Heartilly I'm Squad A Leader Quistis Trepe. If you ever need to talk I'll be around." And with that she

walked over to Squall."Commander we had a little trouble getting her, Zell insisted he get a full meal before we go."

He looked past her to see a bloated Zell and laughing Irvine coming up to the ship. "Alright report to your post inside the ship"  
She winked and replied,"Yes Sir!"

Baffled Irvine and a moaning Zell approached Rinoa. "Hey there! You must be the cute 'lil sorceress we're suppose to protect! Put it there sweetie! M'name's

Irvine. Irvine Kinneas. And what's your name brown eyes?"

She smiled sweetly flattered by this obvious pick-up attempt."Rinoa Heartilly."

"Nice to meet ya Miss Heartilly. I'll be seeing ya." And with the tip of his hat he was off.

Zell staggered up to Rinoa holding his stomach. "Hey I'm Zell but I ate WAYAAAYAAYYA too much so sorry about the..er..ughhhh..ouch!"

Rinoa giggled and helped the poor boy stand."Thanx alo--ugh" and he run into the cockpit.

Squall was glad to see all the company was going to cheer her up. Although none of them could imagine what she was going through they were all willing to

help her overcome it. "Rinoa?"

She nodded and ran into the ship looking excited. 'Oh boy...'

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It was late and everyone suggested that Rinoa take a nap since she's had such a hard day. She agreed and Squall offered her the largest dorm. She

thankfully accepted it.

It was very spacious, considering it was in such a limited area. The walls were all steel and the decorations were plain, or they lacked of therefore.

There was a queen size bed with simple gray sheets and simple gray pillows."It'll do" She said aloud. There was a black metal dresser and a large walk-in

closet. The bathroom was connected and contained a small shower and very small tub, and a toilet with a simple chrome sink and towels on the metal towel

rack. She sighed.

She looked at the overall layout of the room and didn't like it. 'I wonder if...'

The others heard loud shifting noises coming from Rinoa's room. So they all decided to check it out. Dumb-founded they found all the furniture in her room

completely moved into an inviting bedroom. Shocked Selphie asked,"How?"

"I didn't like the place so I thought if I'm a sorceress then this should be easy so I concentrated and i moved everything with my mind!"

Everyone's jaw dropped."Rinoa...that's incredible! Even the most advanced magic takes years and years of studying!" said Quistis

While this shocked everyone it concerned Squall."That could be a problem..." Everyone looked at the silent solider.

"That means she must have received more of Ultimecia then we thought...they're could be a dangerous amount in Rinoa. Enough to make her a threat..."

Everyone looked back at her with puzzled faces.

She just looked like she was going to cry. "GET OUT!" Shocking everyone they all hurried to clear the doorway as she approached Squall. He just stood there tall.

"My life was a fantasy until you ruined it! From now on just don't tell me anything no matter how bad it is! I'm tired of finding out that I'm a horrible evil

monster like you!" And with that she closed the metal door and plopped on her bed crying.

Squall turned around to see everyone huddled behind him listening in."ARRRGGG!!!!!" He roared and scared everyone away. 'I need to be alone...'

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Rinoa had cried herself to sleep. She had fallen into a dream. The setting was dark. Pitch black. She couldn't see. Not able to use any of her sense she felt

her way around hoping to find something solid. As she was reaching she found something soft...she felt up and started to feel something strange like...like

hair! She quickly turned away and ran back not knowing where she was running too. She fell down and the lights picked up.

"Hello child! Kom to me dear! I want to see my daughter's face!"

Mortified she scurried away but was stopped by 4 sharp blades piercing her heart. She looked down shockingly to see her own heart, still beating in place.

She turned around to face this woman with the strange accent and gasped.

"You live because my blood runs in your veins. It's powerful no? You have just discovered who you are am I correct?"

"I live because this is a dream!"

The woman laughed,"A dream?! This is anything but! I brought you here!"

Rinoa looked confused.

"I know my child. You are shocked! But trust me! You are blessed! Blessed with power! You can kontrol the world!"

As this strange woman was speaking she got a chance to take in her face and body. Pale she was with even the palest white hair that ran down to her ankles.

Her eyes were a deep crimson red with an almost purple glow. Her face had black markings that went all the way down to her long slender pale legs. Her

outfit was also a deep red that had slits to show off her legs. She had three 3 circles on her forehead along with a pair of horns and on her back. Gray/black

wings soared from behind her.

Looking at her eyes made Rinoa feel...different. Almost as if a spell was casted on her eyes for all to look at and become her slaves. As she spoke to you in

person she spoke to you in your mind. Such would drive a person crazy but to Rinoa she could understand every word she heard.

Rinoa could already feel that this woman's presence was making her think...bad thoughts...

"You want to kill him don't you?"

Rinoa was surprised that she knew...

"Well I don't blame you dear, he ruined everything!"

Rinoa nodded understanding.

"Well you have the power to kill him! In those small pale hands of yours!"

Rinoa looked at her hands and they shook as she felt power serge through her.

She started to let tears fall down her cheek.

"It's ok to want to kill a man. Killing is alright. Don't be afraid of your instincts."

Rinoa turned her gaze to this powerful but yet stunningly beautiful woman and spoke,"I would never kill anyone or anything! I refuse to become like him! Kill

for nothing!"

The woman just looked at her calmly."Yes I know you do not like killing. You got that from Julia. But she is not your real mother! She is but a used soul to

replace my body with so I could give birth to you!"

Rinoa screamed,"NOOOOOOOO!!!!! I love my mother!"

Now the woman looked annoyed."NO! She is NOT your mother! I AM! Caraway chose her because of her beauty and her figure! We wanted you to be

beautiful and powerful and everything I am!"

"STOP IT! You're not my mother!"

Angrily the woman flicked her wrist and the girl was pushed into a wall forcefully.

The woman simply laughed wickedly and said,"You'll never be as powerful as me if you don't accept that you and I are one!"

And with the wicked laughter repeating in her head Rinoa passed out cold.

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She woke up in her plain gray bed. She remembered what she had dreamed. But feeling a very sharp pain in her back as if it was bruised badly she knew it

was real.

Wincing in pain she screamed. "AHHH!!"

Hearing that Selphie and Zell ran to her room."Rinoa are you o-RINOA!"

She was on the floor with blood all over her. It looked like she had been stabbed in the chest. Quickly Quistis entered the room and gasped as she casted

healing magic upon her. Rinoa breathed heavily as she held in the pain. The remaining SeeDs rushed in to see what the commotion was.

"Holy Crap!" Irvine shouted "Irvine you're not helping!" Selphie shouted back as she quickly started mopping up the blood on the floor.

Squall came in asking what was going on as everyone just looked up with confusion and concern on their faces.

He glanced down to see Rinoa on the floor bleeding severely from her chest. As everyone was scurrying around her casting spells hoping to close the

re-opening wound she shouted."Stop! I don't need your help!" And with that everyone looked at her puzzled. "Watch..." And slowly but surely her wound

sealed up tight.

Silence swept the room.

"She came to me last night. Ultimectia. I know it was her. She told me...things..."

"What'd she say!!!!????" Selphie said jumping up

"She told me I'm her daughter...and Julia's not my mother..."

Everyone was baffled again.

Squall was the first to break the silence,"Let's get you cleaned up. We're about 15 miles away from the house."

Quistis helped Rinoa up and everyone left the room but Selphie and Quistis.

"So Rinoa...I know this is hard and we just met but believe me we're all here for you."

"Yeah! You can count on us Rinoa!" Selphie replied.

Rinoa smiled weakly,"Thanx.."

"WOW. This place is huge." Zell said with goofy wide-eyes.  
"Yeah I know....Hey Squall where we gonna land? I don't see any safe places big enough for this thing"  
"Circle the whole island and we'll find a spot."

Irvine shifted the controls and found a small but sturdy spot to land off the shore.

"Landingggg...now! Hold on!" Irvine shouted.

The girls felt turbulence and wondered what was going on.

"We must be landing." Quistis stated.

Rinoa grew nervous. 'Oh no.....we're here...'

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Authors Note:

Okay I'm done! This is a story i've done before but I didn't like the ending and it was so short! So i changed things up a bit and now I'm happy! So please

review the new clean version of We Just Lost Control: Keep Me Breathing...

3 angelo di desiderio 


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